


The caper with the cat in it (but not enough caviar)

by jinxed_wood



Category: Highlander, Highlander: The Series
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-26
Updated: 2010-12-26
Packaged: 2017-10-14 03:19:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/144776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jinxed_wood/pseuds/jinxed_wood
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Amanda drags a reluctant Methos into trouble - but you should never kid a kidder</p>
            </blockquote>





	The caper with the cat in it (but not enough caviar)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [merriman](https://archiveofourown.org/users/merriman/gifts).



“Amanda, there you are, I thought you might have stood me up!”

Amanda turned slowly to see a tall, saturnine man bearing down on her. “Arkady,” she purred, “I'm sure you would have been terribly distraught if I hadn't attended your little soiree.”

The Russian ambassador smirked down at her. “And I see you came all alone. Are you going -what is you Americans call it – stag?”

Amanda let out a light, tinkling laugh. “Oh, Arkady, you are so amusing...but no, I'm here with a dear friend of mine.”

“Who has left you all alone to fend by yourself?”

Amanda's smiled didn't falter. “Oh, Arkady, you old tease,” she said, “But you're right, he has been awhile. If you'll excuse me, I think I need to track him down. He tends to get a little lost at these occasions – scholarly type, you know.”

Arkady raised an eyebrow. “Scholarly?”

“What can I say, Arkady, opposites attract,” Amanda said, her smiled gleaming as she glanced around the room. She spotted him by the canapés, devouring the caviar. “Ah, there he is,” she thrilled. “If you'll excuse me...” She slid through the crowd, knowing it would only be a matter of moments before Arkady followed.

Methos's eyes gleamed with amusement as she approached. “Enjoying your little chat with the ambassador?” he asked.

“Just smile and play along,” she said lowly. “He's about to join us any minute and-”

“Amanda, m'dear, you _have_ to introduce me to your friend. He sounds _fascinating_.”

Methos quirked an eyebrow. “Do I?”

“Now, Adam, be nice,” Amanda said lightly, as Methos's other eyebrow lifted.

“I hear you're something of a scholar,” boomed Arkady. “Although she failed to mention your academic field...?”

“Did she now,” Methos drawled. “I wonder why?”

“Oh, Adam!” Amanda said, slapping him lightly on the arm. “Adam speaks over twenty languages, Arkady, and all of them are dead!”

“Indeed,” Arkady said.

“Oh yes, I'm quite the the cunning linguist,” Methos said dryly, before popping another cracker heaped with caviar into his mouth.

Amanda gave a light laugh, filling the awkward silence. “Well, now that you two have been properly introduced, I hope you don't mind if I drag Adam to the dance floor,” she said.

“Of course not, m'dear,” Arkady said smoothly. “But do save a spot on your dance card for me.”

“Oh Arkady, what would your wife say?” Amanda said, as she curled her fingers around Methos's arm and dragged him towards the dance floor.

“I note how you didn't ask _me_ whether I wanted to dance,” Methos said quietly, his voice deceptively smooth. “And why is it I'm called Adam again?”

“Well, I could hardly use your new persona now, could I?” Amanda snapped.

“Oh yes, and why is that, Amanda?” he asked coolly.

Amanda stilled. “Ah, I have been meaning to get to that part,” she said reluctantly.

He sighed. “We're not here for the free champagne, are we?”

“It's for a good cause!” she burst out.

Methos gave her a long look. “Amanda, do I look like a Highlander to you?”

“I don't see how that's got to do with anything,”she said, pouting.

“It means that I've been a lot of things throughiout my long life, but I've never been a _boyscout._ ”

“But I promised Bert!”

“Oh, well, if you promised _Bert-_ ”

Amanda brightened.

“What the hell is a bloody _Bert_.”

“Oh, _Methos_.”

“A year's supply of caviar,” he said.

“But-”

“And by caviar, I mean Beluga.”

She rolled her eyes. “Oh, very well – but you're going to play lookout.”

He smirked, rubbing his hands together. “Where do you want me?”

“You won't regret this, Methos,” Amanda said, with a relieved smile.

“No, but you might,” he drawled.

*****

It had seemed like such a good idea at the time. If Methos insisted on crashing at the barge while Duncan was out of town, it was only fair he should earn his room and board. Duncan would thank her, she was sure... if he ever found out.

Amanda had forgotten, however, how very badly things could get when you added one slightly stirred Methos to an already precarious mix. It was like he was a very old, very sarcastic trouble magnet, with no regard for the finer points of burglary.

“Amanda, honey, you do realise there's no such thing as an ex-company man?” he asked, as she peered into the door lock, picks in hand.

“That's not the point, Methos,” she muttered. “The point is he's my friend and he needs a favour...I'd do the same for you.”

“Hmmm,” he drawled.

She looked up from the lock. “How about you just keep an eye on the corridor,” she said sweetly.

“Amanda, are you trying to manage me?”

“ _Methos_

“Alright, alright, I'm _going._ ”

Amanda watched as he padded down the corridor. Really, you couldn't take him anywhere. Sighing, she moved her attention back to the lock. It opened with a few more delicate prods. At last something was going as planned.

She slinked into the room, letting her eyes adjust to the darkness. She had originally intended to break in later that night, but then she would have had to contend with computer passwords and embassy security. Stealing in during the party gave her a twofold advantage. One, she didn't need to steal past the security when she'd already procured an invite and, two, while many people shut down their computers before bed, few locked out their computers before then.

Sure enough, Arkady's computer was on standby and unprotected.

With a smile she extracted a thumb drive from her cleavage and plugged it in – now where was that file?”

“Oh, _Amanda_.” The door eased open slightly, letting in a sliver of light from the corridor.

“Not now, Methos,” Amanda hissed, as she clicked through the various files. Didn't Arkady believe in keeping a clean desktop?

“What's small and furry and rhymes with drat?”

“What?” She looked up again, only to find Methos leaning in the door jamb, a bundle of fur cradled in his arms.

“A cat?” she asked,exasperated. “Really? _Again?_ ”

His eyed widened innocently. “It just popped out of nowhere,” he said plaintively, as the mangy eared mog dug its claws into his arm and glared at her balefully. “I couldn't just leave it wandering around - it might have set off an alarm or something.”

“Methos, there's a party on, the alarm system isn't activated,” Amanda said impatiently.

The cat hissed.

“I think it likes you,” Methos pronounced and Amanda wasn't positive but, for a moment, she actually thought he'd fluttered his eyelashes at her.

She scowled at him, tapping one rubber soled shoe impatiently. “I do believe you're doing this on purpose,”she said.

“Who? Moi? Heaven forfend,” he said lightly. “I mean, it isn't as if I have anything better to do at a New Years Eve party at a Russian Embassy. I mean, who eats caviar nowadays?” The cat began to purr inexplicably, and Methos arched an eyebrow at her.

And then it dawned on Amanda, with a slow creeping horror, that this was how _Duncan_ felt when she unexpectedly dropped into town. “Oh my God,” she whispered.

“I say, what is going on here!”

The door burst open and Arkady stormed inside, pushing Methos into the room before him as he waved a glock in the air. The cat hissed and leapt out of Methos's arms, hitting Arkady full in the face, claws slashing.

That was when the glock went off.

Twice.

Damn it.

*****

“Not one word,” Amanda said, through gritted teeth, as she wrung the Seine out of the remains of her Dior dress.

“Would three suffice?” he shot back, as he emptied his shoe onto the cobbled stone.

“How Duncan puts up with you, I'll never know,” she said stiffly.

“He probably draws on those vast reserves of patience he normally keeps for you,” he said.

A small smile tugged at the edge of her lips, despite herself. “You're impossible.”

“Takes one to know one.”

“I still need those files, and it's going to be more difficult now,” she said, trying to hold onto her anger.

He grinned mischievously. “Well, I guess I'll really be earning that Beluga then, won't I?”

Amanda shook her head as she eyed his dripping form. She could only hope Duncan never found out about this. It was so _embarrassing_. "This time, I'm getting someone _else_ to be the look out," she said pointedly.

"I hear Joe's good at watching," Methos said.

Amanda groaned. "I don't believe you said that."

"Oh yes you do."

"I hate you."

"Oh no you don't."

" _Methos!_ "

  
**THE END - SORT OF.**   



End file.
